Friday, May 17, 2013

business time!

Greetings sports fans,

Whether you're a veteran of the event or a first-time participant, it's time to shine your shoes and preen your portfolios for the annual 4.01k suit run.

When: next Saturday, May 25, starting at 9 AM

Where: Meeting at the Utah State Capitol, running down Wall Street, and ending up, eventually, at the Gateway Mall





































The 4.01 k suit run is:
free
a "formal" event--business attire and collegiality encouraged
also sweaty
very roughly 4.01 kilometers
open to anyone interested
a blast!

The 4.01 k suit run is not:
an organized "race" with numbers, swag, and porta-potties
at all associated with Ragnar or KSL 1160
ever that predictable
officially registered with the City of Salt Lake
going to involve any motorcades, roadblocks, or or aid stations
a sound investment

Here are some examples of what previous events have looked like.

Also, because 2013 marks the 5-year anniversary of the 4.01k suit run, this year's event will begin with a brief commemoration of our corporate legacy (including juicy quasi-legal melodrama!), shortly after which the run will begin.

If you're in town, please join us! Invite friends and esteemed associates!

And if you have any questions, feel free to post them below or email horselongitudes at gmail dot com.

Wednesday, April 10, 2013

vibrant matter & the low cunning of the potato















 
Even a potato in a dark cellar has a certain low cunning about him which serves him in excellent stead. He knows perfectly well what he wants and how to get it. He sees the light coming from the cellar window and sends his shoots crawling straight thereto: they will crawl along the floor and up the wall and out the cellar window; if there be a little earth anywhere on the journey he will find it and use it for his own ends. What deliberation he may exercise in the manner of his roots when he is planted in the earth is a thing unknown to us, but we can imagine him saying, ‘I will have a tuber here and a tuber there, and I will suck whatsoever advantage I can from all my surroundings. This neighbor I will overshadow, and that I will undermine; and what I can do shall be the limit of what I will do. He that is stronger and better placed than I shall overcome me, and him that is weaker I will overcome.’ The potato says these things by doing them, which is the best of languages. What is consciousness if this is not consciousness?

—Samuel Butler, Erewhon

 




Thursday, April 04, 2013

Sunday, March 31, 2013

The Resurrection of Hunahpu and Xbalanque


On the fifth day they appeared again. People saw them in the river, for the two of them appeared like people-fish. Now when their faces were seen by the Xibalbans, they made a search for them in the rivers.

And on the very next day, they appeared again as two poor orphans. They wore rags in front and rags on their backs. Rags were thus all they had to cover themselves. But they did not act according to their appearance when they were seen by the Xibalbans. For they did the Dance of the Whippoorwill and the Dance of the Weasel. They danced the Armadillo and the Centipede. They danced the Injury, for many marvels they did then. They set fire to a house as if it were truly burning, then immediately recreated it again as the Xibalbans watched with admiration.


Saturday, March 30, 2013

The Head of Hunahpu is Restored


So the ball was again dropped into play. The head of Hunahpu was first placed atop the ballcourt.

“We have already triumphed. You are finished. You gave in, so give it up,” they were told.

But Hunahpu just called out: “Strike the head as if it were a rubber ball,” they were told. “No harm will come to us now, for we are holding our own.”

Thus the lords of Xibalba threw down the ball where it was met by Xbalanque. The ball landed before his yoke and bounced away. It sailed clear over the ballcourt. It just bounced once, then twice, landing in the tomatoes. Then the rabbit came out, hopping along. All the Xibalbans thus went after him. The Xibalbans all went after the rabbit, shouting and rushing about.

Thus the twins were able to retrieve the head of Hunahpu, replacing it where the chilacayote squash had been. They then placed the chilacayote squash on the ballcourt, while the true head of Hunahpu was his once more. Therefore they both rejoiced again. While the Xibalbans were out searching for their rubber ball, the twins retrieved it from the tomato patch.

And when they had done so, they called out: “Come on! We found our rubber ball!” they said. Thus they were carrying the round ball when the Xibalbans returned.

“What was it that we saw?” they asked.

And so they began again to play ball, both teams making equal plays until at last Xbalanque struck the chilacayote squash, strewing it all over the ballcourt. Thus its seeds were scattered before them.

“What is this that has been brought here? Where is he that brought it?” asked the Xibalbans.

Thus the lords of Xibalba were defeated by Hunahpu and Xbalanque. They had passed through great affliction, but despite everything that had been done to them, they did not die.

Friday, March 29, 2013

march madness

The Deeds of One Hunahpu and Seven Hunahpu above Xibalba

… As for One Hunahpu and Seven Hunahpu, they would merely play dice and ball every day. The four of them would pair off to oppose each other.

When they gathered together to play in the ballcourt, the Falcon would arrive to watch over them. …

Now it was on the path leading to Xibalba where they played ball. Thus the lords of Xibalba, One Death and Seven Death, heard them:

“What is happening on the surface of the earth? They are just stomping about and shouting. May they be summoned here therefore. They shall come to play ball, and we shall defeat them. They have simply failed to honor us. They have neither honor nor respect. Certainly they act arrogantly here over our heads,” said therefore all those of Xibalba....

Now we shall tell of their journey to Xibalba. …


The Summons of One Hunahpu and Seven Hunahpu to Xibalba

Then was the arrival of the messengers of One Death and Seven Death:

“Go you war councilors to summon One Hunahpu and Seven Hunahpu. Tell them when you arrive, ‘Thus say the lords: They must come, say the lords to you. They must come here to play ball with us that we may be invigorated by them. Truly we are amazed greatly at them. Thus they must come, say the lords. May they bring hither their implements—their yokes, their arm protectors, and their rubber ball as well. Thus say the lords,’ tell them when you arrive there,” the messengers were told.

These messengers were the owls—Arrow Owl, One Leg Owl, Macaw Owl, and Skull Owl—for so the messengers of Xibalba were called.

This Arrow Owl was like the arrow, piercing.

This One Leg Owl merely had one leg, but there were his wings.

This Macaw Owl had a red back, and there were also his wings.

Now this Skull Owl only had a skull with no legs; there were merely wings.

The burden of these four messengers was to be the war councilors. Thus they arrived there from Xibalba. They arrived suddenly, perching atop the ballcourt....

The owls, therefore, alighted atop the ballcourt, where they delivered in order the words of One Death and Seven Death, Pus Demon and Jaundice Demon, Bone Staff and Skull Staff, Flying Scab and Gathered Blood, Sweepings Demon and Stabbings Demon, Wing, and Packstrap. For these are the names of all the lords. Thus the owls repeated their words.

“Are these not the words of the lords One Death and Seven Death?”

“Those are the words that they said,” replied the owls. “We shall surely be your companions. ‘You shall bring all the gaming things,’ say the lords.”…


Sunday, February 10, 2013

Reclaiming Reclamation

I

The Alternator:

Is about the size of a large fist
and so, as we’re told, is also the size of the human heart.

Is a tight case of coiled wire, of rolling magnets.

Is a translation from kinetic quickness to alternating currents.

Is where the serpentine belt spins out golden strands of voltage.

This is what the alternator is. This is what it does.
This is what it stopped doing one October evening on Highway 191.

Waiting for a tow in the fading light, we collected seeds from the hesperaloe,
from the dried, brittle head of what had been a brilliant red flower.
The seeds, small black wedges, like slices of carbon
or misshapen tokens for some infernal ferryman.


II

Parts and Labor

The following evening, having reached the place,
We walked out the length of an old road cut,
Which led from the highway to a water tank and some microwave towers.

The roadbed eroded, unmade, its reclamation reclaimed
Littered with rabbit droppings, deer bones, and snake skins
grown over in dry, golden grasses, in juniper and yucca.

Scraping through the fallen leaves and standing tangles of scrub oak
Tom asks, “Dad, what comes after people?”

Tom, who four years ago was, himself, not yet the size of my fist,
Who was barely his own heartbeat, who was, himself, before people.

“What comes after people?”
“I think worms! Mom, I think beetles! I think—look! A potsherd!”

He reaches, and from amid the clumps of tar-fixed gravel and road base,
Plucks it up, a grey one, corrugated on one side, about the size of a sunglass lens.
He holds it in the air, then sets it down, finding others,
Left by the ones whose lives passed between the plateau and cliffside,
The ones who dressed themselves in black, iridescent wool spun from turkey feathers.
The ones who had left the valley now named for dead warrior kings. Montezuma. Cortez.


III

Home

A few days stalking their quiet memory. A few nights of fires,
And we trace our way back,

Stopping to take on a sack of dried beans from the red fields.
Some melons from the Green River.
And, at the pullout with the cinderblock toilets, piƱon nuts,
Where millions litter the ground amid the spat gum and idling semis.

Saturday, January 19, 2013

Tuesday, January 08, 2013

lions in winter

Earlier this week Kelly noticed the mountain lion tracks through our back yard. Large, clawless paws with long, bounding spaces between prints. He had probably been chasing the deer, whose tracks also crossed the two-foot deep snow through the yard. It must have been a couple nights before, but not too long, because the lion’s path crossed over the top of the tracks I’d made out to the shed and back around the first of the year.

I say “he” mainly because, as some friends here have told us, it’s often the young male lions, recently separated from their mothers, still without a territory of their own, who sometimes end up wandering hungry into and around town. Especially when the temperature drops below zero and just sits there for week after week, as it is now.

This is what happened last month, when Charlie Stevens was shoveling snow out of his driveway and accidentally scared a young lion out of his front window well. (We used to live right across the street from Charlie, when we first moved to town years ago.) Anyway, that lion climbed a tree on the other side of the block and spent most of the day up there, drawing a big crowd of dogs, neighborhood kids, police and DNR trucks, and a TV crew, until someone came and shot him down.

related: lion hunt, school lions, tracks

Friday, December 28, 2012

Costa Rica bird list: Dec 10-23, 2012
















Costa Rica relief map (shells, nuts, megalodon shark tooth fossil, palm leaf quetzal)


Osprey
Black Vulture
Turkey Vulture
Groove-billed Ani
Great-tailed Grackle
Baltimore Oriole
Melodious Blackbird
Brown Jay
Blue Jay*
Loggerhead Shrike*
Common Bush Tanager
Blue-gray Tanager
Passerinni’s Tanager
Clay-colored Robin (yigüirro)
Sooty Robin
Buff-throated Saltator
Blue Black Swallow
Black Swift
Kiskadee
Blue-black Grassquit
Yellow-faced Grassquit
White-collared Seedeater
Buff-rumped Warbler
Golden-Browed Chlorophonia
Rufous-collared Sparrow
Black-striped Sparrow
Carolina Chickadee*
Masked Tityra
Back-cheeked Woodpecker
Hoffman’s Woodpecker
Red-crowned Woodpecker (Hoffman’s hybrid)
Keel-billed Toucan
Chestnut-mandibled Toucan
Fiery-billed AraƧari
Squirrel Cuckoo
Rufous Motmot
Mocking Bird*
Violet Sabrewing
Coppery-headed Emerald
Purple-throated Mountain-gem
Green-crowned Brilliant
Green Thorntail
Muscovy Duck
Wood Duck*
Black Guan
Crimson-fronted Parakeet
White-crowned Parrot
Slate Throated Redstart
Cardinal*
Brown Pelican
Ringed Kingfisher
House Wren
Gray-breasted Wood Wren
Inca Dove
Ruddy Ground Dove
White-winged Dove
Rock Pigeon
White Ibis
Tricolored Heron
Little Blue Heron
Green Heron
Yellow-crowned Night Heron
Great Blue Heron
Bare-throated Tiger Heron
Spotted Sandpiper
Wilson’s Plover
Semipalmated Plover
Killdeer*
Whimbrel
Willet
Ruddy Turnstone
Sanderling
Red Knot
Cattle Egret
Snowy Egret
Great Egret
Neotropic Cormorant
Anhinga

*actually, a few of these seen between the forests and the sprawl surrounding the George Bush International Airport in Houston (layover)

related: 2008 list 

Thursday, October 25, 2012

Skulls. Unlimited. International.


Maybe you’ve seen these guys on TV. They’re based out in the middle of Oklahoma and their catalogue reads like the opening scene of Macbeth.




There are economy skeletons for the cheapskate bone articulator in your life. Custom skull cleaning. Mice and mice. Bigfoot footprints. An emu.
Also, raccoon bacula! (Curious? Yes, definitely check out the raccoon bacula.)




















For more details, here's a good article Outside Magazine ran a few years ago.

And for more skeleton collections, here's a nice one on pinterest. (And no hot glue!)

Thursday, August 30, 2012

Washoe to Sanpete

Oh, right. I still have this blog. Also, we moved.
Here’s a little update.






























Seeing all our stuff boxed up, carried across the front yard, and packed into a 9'x8'x12' space reminded me of this photo series by Peter Menzel: MaterialWorld: A Global Family Portrait

















































I think we first came across these a few years ago when they were showing at an airport somewhere (Chicago? Atlanta?). Then, a couple years ago, I saw his Hungry Planet: What the World Eats series when it was making the rounds as an email forward. They're photos of families with their typical weekly groceries, details here.


































I guess these aren’t new. Maybe you’ve seen them. Whatever. I’m all like “I saw this way back when it was at the airport. You should have been there. What a layover. Such a layover!” 
Anyway, speaking of hipsters, Sannah Kvist’s project is worth a look too.


Also, we live in Utah now.